The self-help world loves to preach about consistency. Have you heard the ever-so-popular phrase “consistency is key”?

There is a good reason for it, but this story is not about the why, but more about… the how. Instead of rehashing the popular phrase “consistency is key” (because I know, I know) I’m going to share with you a different phrase that flicked a switch inside.

Whether you have a personal goal you want to achieve or some big career goals, breaking them down into their tiny steps and taking consistent action is critical to achieving them. But how can we maintain this drive to achieve “consistency”?

* * *

I’ve had many experiences with ‘consistency’. Often, it’s been the roller coaster of doing all the right things for a bit, then getting bored or complacent, and “taking a break”, but that break happens for too long and too often, and so usually, it’s back to square one. 

Frustrating. 

Of course, I may be overly dramatic here – discounting the work I do and allowing my Inner Critic to shout and stamp her foot – but truthfully, lack of consistency brings me quite a lot of pain. Exhibit A: I might have written a handful of books by now if I had been truly consistent in my writing practice.

A couple of weeks ago I ran a marathon (yay! But for the purposes of this story, we’re zooming right back to the beginning of the training cycle). It was around 20 weeks out from race day, and I was figuring out if I could skip a workout. Instead of pandering to my excuses, my husband simply said, “you need to fall in love with consistency”.

He was right. So right.

Until that point, I would whinge and whine and complain if I was comfier on the couch than out running, and I was looking for excuses left right and centre. But that is not the way to train for a marathon. 

It’s not the way for any worthy endeavour. 

The trouble is, pursuing a difficult goal is not only challenging, but often, it’s boring. Setting the goal is exciting. Telling people about it is exciting. Showing up, day in, day out – not so much. It can get boring. Focusing on the why – the reason behind whatever you are doing, what you are building – makes the action easier, but isn’t always quite enough. 

You have to fall in love with the process of showing up, day in, day out.

You have to fall in love with consistency.

The positive force of love

Ever since his words echoed in the living room of our small inner-city Sydney house, I have had them on repeat. I apply the idea to everything, from healthy meal planning to the way I show up at work to my writing practice. The words centre me. They remind me that the smallest actions build to something. That the mundanity of consistency is worth celebrating just like the day I got my marathon medal. Isn’t there something magical and uplifting about the words “fall in love”? Love, of course, is a powerful force.

Instead of ‘consistency’ being an irritating concept to sigh at, I’m instead falling in love with regularly showing up for my goals, which means I’m showing up for myself. 

Watch out for procrastination disguised as productivity

Let’s shift out of the whimsy for a moment and talk about the practicalities.

Consistently showing up is great, but if we are aiming to build or create something or grow in some way, the consistent action needs to be an action that actually shifts the needle. 

It’s possible to be consistent but not make progress. Yup.

This is because it is possible to do things that really making change. For me, this used to look like constantly researching how to write an ebook, or planning it, instead of just writing it. Part of the practice of showing up is also getting good at nudging at the edges of your comfort zone, which is where growth happens. 

The goal creates the journey, and you can love the journey

Goals or process? My opinion is that you need both. I don’t see how you can have only one or the other – the goal gives you the direction for the journey, after all. The plan you make for action creates the process and the journey.

It’s about falling in love with the journey of growth towards being the person you want to become. Enjoy the momentum consistency creates. Enjoy the goals you get to hit because of it.